The T.Y.P.E - Sarah Key
If
you grow up the type of woman men want to look at,
you
can let them look at you. But do not mistake eyes for hands.
Or
windows. Or mirrors.
Let
them see what a woman looks like.
They
may not have ever seen one before.
If
you grow up the type of woman men want to touch, you can let them touch you.
Sometimes
it is not you they are reaching for.
Sometimes
it is a bottle. A door. A sandwich.
A
Pulitzer. Another woman.
But
their hands found you first.
Do
not mistake yourself for a guardian.
Or
a muse. Or a promise. Or a victim. Or a snack.
You
are a woman. Skin and bones. Veins and nerves.
Hair
and sweat.
You
are not made of metaphors. Not apologies.
Not
excuses.(…)
- What
is the significance of the distinction between "eyes" and
"hands" in the first stanza?
- The
distinction emphasizes the difference between looking and touching,
highlighting the idea that being seen does not equate to being physically
available. The poet warns against conflating observation with ownership
or entitlement, reinforcing the autonomy of the woman being observed.
- How
does the poem challenge traditional metaphors used to describe women?
- The
poem rejects the idea that women should be seen as symbols—muses,
promises, or victims. Instead, it asserts that women are real, physical
beings, not abstract ideas or objects for others to project meaning onto.
This directly challenges the way literature and society often romanticize
or diminish women through metaphor.
- What
is the effect of the repetition of "If you grow up the type of woman
men want..." at the beginning of the first two stanzas?
- The
repetition reinforces the inevitability of certain societal expectations
placed on women, emphasizing that their identity is often shaped by male
desire. However, by following it with affirmations of agency ("you
can let them look" / "you can let them touch"), the poet
introduces the possibility of choice and control over one's own body.
- What
does the poem suggest about the way men interact with women in relation to
their own desires or needs?
- The
poem implies that men often see women as substitutes for their own
unfulfilled desires. The comparison to a "bottle,"
"door," or "Pulitzer" suggests that women are
sometimes treated as placeholders for ambition, comfort, or escape,
rather than being valued as individuals. This highlights the
objectification and instrumentalization of women in male-centric
narratives.
- Why
do you think the poet emphasizes the physical reality of a woman in the
final lines?
- By
focusing on the tangible aspects of a woman's body—"skin and
bones," "veins and nerves"—the poet reclaims the idea that
a woman exists beyond how she is perceived. This grounding in physicality
rejects societal labels, metaphors, and justifications that seek to
define or excuse how women are treated.
- How
does the poem redefine agency and self-perception for women in contrast to
societal expectations?
- The
poem affirms that women have autonomy over their bodies and identities,
rather than being passive figures shaped by external perceptions. It
encourages women to resist being seen as mere symbols and to embrace
their own existence outside of male desire or societal labels. This shift
from being "looked at" or "touched" to
self-recognition empowers women to define themselves on their own terms.
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